Essay 6. The sadness with grandma

Russell iam writing this essay about my Grandma with sooo much love. I about my Grandma. I care about her. My Grandma is my mother mum. For most of my life my grandma and my Grandad both lived in their house together in the town their marriage is long. This is about the sadness with grandma is that she has alot of physical pain she doesn't do any or very little physical movement she was in bed all day. She watches and trusts the mainstream media and and she does sleep all day or very much during the day. Russell since I was a child my mother and my Grandma have a doctor that is a old man. Her doctor is soo old he was probably the doctor of the dinosaurs this man is the joe Biden of doctors I don't trust the doctor that my mother and my Grandma sees cause I think that all he does is give grandma alot of painkillers and pills. I do think that she doesn't need all of them. Especially when she isn't doing any physical movement. Russell my Grandma moved in with me and my mother after she fell over at the shops not far from her house and she hurt her shoulder. Russell I want to be honest with you because iam flawed like us all. For a long time I got angry and frustrated with my Grandma because she was sleeping all day and because I think my Grandma is big Pharmaceutical best customer. It is the sadness with grandma. I thought and I did say that she was lazy Russell. Because I was saying what I was seeing I felt and I do feel about calling her lazy. But I didn't have alot of information. My mother and me had alot of fights because I was getting annoyed at grandma. This is the sadness with grandma. One fight with my mother about my Grandma was in her car after we went to the chemist that is connected to her doctors office. I got annoyed with my Grandma because I love her. And I want better for her. This is the sadness with grandma and I want better for her Russell my mother thought and told me that I didn't care about my Grandma because I was saying want I could see. Because my Grandma lives in the same house I live in. It made a fire of anger in me. I don't trust the doctor that my Grandma and my mother see. Russell my toxic mother told me that I should not grieve when my Grandma dies.v that was very painful to hear. Mother is trying to control how I grieve when that happens. Russell it's not the first time that my mother has wanted too control how I grieve because my mother hates my dad soo much she hates my wearing my Dads jacket in the house or anywhere near her. The sadness with grandma. My mother says that we are just waiting for my Grandma to die we aren't going to try to do anything different. But I want better for her. But I know I can't make grandma better she has to choose change herself. This is the sadness with grandma she has a care person come to the house to give her a shower. Russell this year me and my mother were fighting alot and she sent me too my nanna My dads mum.house because she couldn't cope with me and she wanted a break from me. She told my nanna to give me a mood adjustment but my mother never does any work On herself this is the sadness with grandma. Then my nanna told my mother she can't do that. Then my nanna told me that she has a blood clot in her heart. I don't know how long she has had this. Or when it started. Since then I have been trying to Fix my bond with grandma. This is the sadness about grandma.